Translator: Dj22031
Editor: Dj22031
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Chaos reigned at the scene. The ghostly soldiers of the Xiusheng Sect and the employees of the Taicang Sect were huddled together, filled with yin energy, brimming with fighting spirit, and the atmosphere was tense— but not directed at the humans present.
The Taoist priests, who had just been fighting the ghost soldiers, put down their magical implements in a daze. As far as their eyes could see, the group of ghosts that Zhang Pang had summoned not long ago were now surrounded. The male ghosts who had been brought by their families to arrange ghost marriages were mercilessly pushed aside by the thirsty ghost soldiers, helplessly watching their original blind dates being showered with attention.
After a long while, a local Daoist from Xin’an finally spoke up hesitantly: “Shall we continue fighting?”
The Taoist priests from the capital quickly recognized several particularly flamboyant and lively faces in the group of men in suits. They were the two department managers they had met before at the haunted house in Taicang. Upon hearing this, they couldn’t help but feel lost: “The problem now doesn’t seem to be whether we want to fight or not.”
It’s that they have no rivals at all!
The menacing ghostly soldiers had abandoned the Taoist priests and were arguing with their newly appeared adversaries. Their aura remained just as dangerous and ferocious, except this time their threat wasn’t to humans—
“Outrageous! This is a marriage arranged for us by the sect leader!”
Their opponents, however, had a very valid point, arguing vehemently: “Are you all sick? What era are we living in? Do you still think this is some feudal, arranged marriage from your time? What do you mean by ‘marriage prepared for you’? Have you asked your intended spouse if they agree? Don’t you understand what respect and women’s liberation mean?”
The ghost soldiers of the Xiusheng Sect really didn’t understand. It was not their fault. The times had progressed too fast. After dying far from home and staying in their original place for many years, they were raised by Zhang Pang in the Taoist temple as henchmen. They usually helped him with illegal and disorderly activities. So how could they come into contact with the culture of the new era?
However, they were used to being arrogant and considered themselves superior, so how could they listen to reason? Their first reaction upon hearing this was that they felt challenged, and they all flew into a rage: “Where did this lowly scoundrel come from, spouting such nonsense! We’ll make sure you’re all utterly terrified!”
The soldiers of the Qing Dynasty didn’t have a strong sense of the rule of law, and they instinctively wanted to solve problems with force— they weren’t afraid of fighting or killing at all!
But before they could even make a move, the whispers of the female ghosts suddenly came from the side, and one could vaguely hear some discussion—
“Male chauvinism…”
“Violent tendencies…”
“His personality is no good…”
The ruthless Yin soldiers of the Xiusheng Cult turned around and found that their blind date partners indeed had a bad impression of their violent behavior. They immediately dared not mention fighting anymore and instead became completely at a loss.
To be honest, these Qing Dynasty ghost soldiers, who had fought on the battlefield in their previous lives, were actually quite powerful. Perhaps because they had truly seen blood, they displayed great combat awareness during the battle, knowing how to deploy their troops in formation. Their ghostly blades were wielded with ferocious force, and they were fearless in the face of death, leaving the Taoist priests overwhelmed by their every move.
However, this ability didn’t seem to be an advantage in the context of dating, at least not for modern female ghosts. It was actually quite unattractive and more like a disadvantage: all he does is wield weapons and fight, which raises suspicions of violent tendencies. What if there’s domestic violence after marriage?
Uncle Shen looked disdainfully at the anxious competitors and boasted to Wei Xi, “Boss, our employees started preparing immediately after receiving your call. The company spent a fortune on these outfits for them, and those who qualified were only the better ones. Almost all of our middle and lower-level leaders are here. In terms of salary, career prospects, and social status, what do these bumpkins have to compete with us?”
Reality was indeed just as he said. The appearance of the Taicang Sect employees was truly shocking. On one side were well-dressed social elites who were both romantic and capable, even bringing flowers. On the other side were a cosplay-like armored team, carrying knives. Which side was more in line with the tastes of the marriage market? Need I say more?
The disadvantages of the Ghost Soldiers of the Xiusheng Sect didn’t stop there. They also lacked education. In the Qing Dynasty, there was no literacy education. Even the most literate centurion among them might not have a primary school education. A few apples would probably be enough to stump them. Not to mention the chicken-and-rabbit problem.
The people present at Taicang Sect were mostly modern ghosts. Although many of them committed suicide because they couldn’t make a living, who among them hadn’t gone to school for a few years while they were alive? There were even plenty of people with higher education, weren’t there?! One literature graduate student who had his eye on a girl even recited Tagore’s poems on the spot.
The ghost soldiers of the Xiusheng Cult looked at the shy smile on the female ghost’s face as she accepted the flowers, and could only think: “???”
Age was also no good. They died in the Qing Dynasty and were now all over a hundred years old. However, most of the relatives brought by the Xiusheng Church to participate in their activities had recently passed away, with the oldest being only fifty or sixty. As the saying goes, there is a generation gap every three years. The generation gap between those over a hundred years old and those over fifty years old was even deeper than the Somali Trench.
Another point was appearance. Soldiers were physically active and were all tall and strong. In this respect, the employees of Taicang Sect were at a disadvantage. However, this disadvantage was immediately reversed the moment a certain Yin soldier of Xiusheng Sect anxiously took off his armor!
The female ghosts at the blind date looked at the soldier’s shiny bald head and all exclaimed “Oh my god!”
Hey! Yeah, they were from the Qing Dynasty, so of course they had the yin-yang hairstyle[1]! Even Daniel Wu couldn’t pull off this killer hairstyle, and the girls immediately looked away in disgust.
The Qing Dynasty ghost soldiers realized they were being rejected, and they couldn’t help but hug their armor and shed sad tears. Back when they were alive, they would compete to see who had the cleanest shaved forehead. The aesthetics of this society changed too quickly. How could ghosts who died young keep up with the trends?
Finally, it came down to their careers. In this respect, the Yin soldiers finally gained confidence. They were different from the wandering ghosts; they were all properly worshipped and worked in the temple by the Xiusheng Sect! They could also trick believers into giving them offerings, so they had food, drink, and work!
Taicang Sect employees: “Hehe.”
The Taoist priest, who was not far away, could also hear several employees complaining: “…these are the lowest-level losers in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.”
Taoist priests: “…”
After their cold laughs subsided, the employees nonchalantly pulled out their pay slips. The slips clearly listed their basic salary, commissions, and all the usual meal allowances and benefits. Some, like the “Drowning Ghost,” were junior managers in the haunted house department, receiving additional bonuses based on the haunted house’s quarterly performance— a truly lucrative figure for a ghost! Not only was their job security stable, but there were also endless opportunities for promotion and advancement! Perhaps one day they could even secure a permanent, stable job! After forming a ghost marriage, while other things might be uncertain, their family’s finances would definitely be guaranteed!
What! What kind of magical company is this?! The Qing Dynasty ghost soldiers, who had previously only received generous offerings within the Xiusheng Sect and thus had virtually no savings, slowly turned their gaze to Zhang Pang, who stood to the side with a pale face.
When the chubby boy saw their gazes, his mournful expression turned anxious: “Master, our salaries and benefits have been surpassed by our competitors. How can we retain talent like this!”
Zhang Pang: “…………”
As a cult leader, Zhang Pang had always been the one to challenge other people’s values. Today, for the first time, his values had been challenged, and he couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of helplessness.
He even involuntarily averted his gaze from meeting his own ghostly soldiers, staring intently at Wei Xi, who was discussing the female ghost’s position and the venue for the mass wedding of his employees with Uncle Shen— what on earth was going on?! This Taoist priest seemed too strange! Was he really not a fellow member of his cult?!
Wei Xi was quite polite to him. When he realized that he was looking at him, he even gave him a slight smile: “Fellow Daoist Zhang, your teaching is really good and your concepts are advanced. We still have a lot to learn from you in terms of caring for the lives of your employees.”
Wei Xi hadn’t anticipated using mass matchmaking to solve his employees’ single status; in his view, the Xiusheng Sect was undoubtedly at the forefront of humanistic values in the industry. However, the number of female ghosts summoned this time was a bit too few. With several hundred unmarried men in the Taicang Sect, it wasn’t enough to distribute them all. He wished there were more.
He spoke so sincerely, yet Zhang Pang’s eyes instantly reddened, feeling deeply humiliated: “Fine! Fine! I underestimated you. I never expected that you Taoists from the capital would have such methods!”
The Taoist priests of the Beijing Taoist Association: “…”
Don’t make sweeping generalizations, okay? What does this have to do with us?
Zhang Pang reacted quickly, realizing the situation was dire, and without lingering, turned and ran.
This was absolutely a pyramid scheme!
He was very familiar with the terrain of his own Taoist temple. After abandoning his image of being a Taoist immortal, he became even more shameless and ran away quickly. The two Taoist priests present immediately came to their senses and, no longer caring about the strange scene of ghosts meeting each other, grabbed their magic weapons and chased after him. Zhang Pang, who was skilled in many ways, immediately threw out a strange talisman.
The moment the talisman was unleashed, a cloud of choking dust filled the air, delaying everyone for a few seconds. By the time the dust cleared, Zhang Pang and his apprentice, Little Fatty, were no longer in the courtyard.
Xu Xiaofeng’s soul hasn’t been retrieved yet, so everyone, needless to say, must press their advantage. Wei Xi naturally followed the main group, but before they could even chase them out the gate, the group of Qing Dynasty ghost soldiers left behind by Zhang Pang, who had failed in their matchmaking attempts, suddenly surrounded them and blocked them firmly behind the gate.
Having experienced the power of their armored forms firsthand, the Taoist priests were immediately alarmed and prepared for battle: “Do you still intend to aid and abet evil?!”
The ghostly soldiers remained unmoved upon hearing this, their gazes fixed intently on Wei Xi in the crowd, their eyes sharp and burning.
One of the Taoist priests couldn’t help but show a worried expression, and said to Wei Xi, “Fellow Daoist Wei, you have ruined their marriage. These Yin soldiers will probably hold a grudge…”
Before he could finish speaking, the centurion at the head of the group stepped forward, cupped his hands, and solemnly asked, “Master Wei! May I ask what the requirements are for seeking employment at your esteemed temple?”
The Taoist priest who spoke: “…”
The other Taoist priests in both places, who were on high alert, also fell speechless.
They never expected this to become a job-seeking program.
The faint sound of the chubby boy sobbing could be heard in the wind—
“Master, what should we do? Our treatment is too poor, and we’re not as professional as other companies. Now our employees have no market value at matchmaking events, and even the ghost soldiers have all jumped ship…”
“……Shut up!”
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