Translator: Dj22031
Editor: Dj22031
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Back home, Gu Mian saw the table full of steaming dishes. Seeing him coming, Mrs. Wang immediately asked, “Sir, do you want something to eat?”
“No.” Gu Mian refused.
“You have been drinking nutrient solution for the past few days, and your complexion looks worse.” Mrs. Wang did not dare to persuade him. “I made some soup for you. Let me know if you want to drink it.”
Gu Mian returned to his study. He continued to work, but he didn’t drink the nutritional solution. He didn’t want to eat now, and he even felt nauseous.
Many people knew that Gu Mian liked to drink nutrient solution, but only a few people understood that Gu Mian’s habit of drinking nutrient solution was developed since his mother passed away.
To him, the taste of the food was less important than the people he was dining with.
Admiral Gu rarely went home. Gu Mian dined with his mother almost every day. Her mother’s cooking skills were not very good and the food was not delicious. She seemed to be born with no knowledge of cooking, even if she was taught by others, the food cooked could only be swallowed.
“How does it taste?” “Eat more”, “Don’t be picky about food”, “What do you want to eat tomorrow?”…
There was a small table with two dishes and one soup. The mother’s nagging was Gu Mian’s. The whole concept of dining was also hers.
Since his mother’s death, Gu Mian had become more accustomed to drinking nutrient solution alone. This habit was broken after Li Songyun appeared.
He and Li Songyun established a new family. It was Gu Mian’s insistence that the family eat together. He believed that only in this way can a family feel like a home.
The rice cooked by Li Songyun was delicious. When he and Li Songyun sat together to eat, Li Songyun would ask him “is it delicious?”, “do you want something saltier or lighter?”, “when will you go home tomorrow”… …
In the past, when the ventilation system was not so perfect, when his mother was busy in the kitchen every day, the smell of oil smoke would fill the entire house.
Now that the exhaust ventilation in the kitchen was very good, he could only smell a faint smell of smoke from Li Songyun, who was wearing an apron.
Li Songyun pursed his lips nervously and asked him who was still eating: “Gu Mian, do you like the food I cooked?”
Did he like it?
It seemed that at the beginning, he couldn’t tell whether he liked or disliked the food cooked by Li Songyun. He believed that the husband should eat the food cooked by his wife, and the wife had the obligation to cook for her husband.
When did this feeling change? Maybe it was when he came home one time and saw Li Songyun and his children sitting at the dinner table. He then heard Li Songyun softly say to Gu Hongxuan, “We have to wait for dad to come back and have dinner together.”
The food was steaming on the table, and Gu Hongxuan turned his head. Seeing that he was back, he screamed in surprise, and Li Songyun also smiled at him.
At that moment, he found that his insistence on returning home on time suddenly had meaning again.
….
Gu Mian had a fever.
Maybe it was because he was not comforted by his partner during the susceptible period, maybe because he was overly exhausted during this period, maybe because he was wandering the streets late at night alone after leaving Li Songyun’s new home…
The first person to notice that he was abnormal was Mrs. Wang. Mrs. Wang brought the soup into Gu Mian’s study. Then she saw a strange redness on Gu Mian’s face and took his body temperature which came to 39 degrees.
Sister-in-law Wang said, “Madam left the antipyretic medicine at home two days ago, and now it’s just right for you, sir.”
“Did Li Songyun have a fever?” Gu Mian asked.
Mrs. Wang hesitated for a while, and finally couldn’t help but say: “The day madam proposed to divorce you, he had a fever. For the first time, madam said that he wanted to rest for a while and not prepare to cook.”
“No matter how uncomfortable his body was before, madam never said he said he wanted to rest. But Admiral Gu asked Madam to prepare dinner for you before resting.”
After Mrs. Wang left the room, Gu Mian was the only one left in the room. He had a severe headache, his body was cold, and his stomach felt like a cold stomach. There was something burning, making him feel sick to his stomach.
The fever was uncomfortable.
His groggy brain once again heard Mrs. Wang’s words, “I saw Madam in the kitchen looking very sad, his hands shaking even when chopping vegetables.”
Gu Mian supported his dizzy head and covered his eyes with his palms. The exposed mandibular line remained cold and calm. After a long time, Gu Mian opened the document and added a new line to the fifteen-page document: “Asked Li Songyun to complete the housework when he is sick.”
After drinking the medicine, Gu Mian lay alone on the empty bed. His body was very tired, but he could not fall asleep.
Whenever he was recovering from an injury, Li Songyun would sit in front of the bed, gently massage his temples, and hum songs as if soothing children.
At that time, Li Songyun had just given birth to his first child. Gu Hongxuan was lying in the cradle. He was lying on the hospital bed. Li Songyun looked at the child in the cradle and couldn’t help but smile softly. Then he leaned over and kissed the child’s forehead quietly.
The warm yellow light shone on the omega in his nightgown, coating his skin with a flawless light. This scene was as beautiful as an oil painting.
——“You can also list what you haven’t done, such as whether you often praise your wife, express your love to your wife, and give her gifts that you personally selected…not money, but gifts in kind. “
——”No? In all these years, Li Songyun has never made your heart flutter!”
“What does it mean to be moved?”
——”I can’t explain this kind of thing to you. What’s going on? I’ve become your intimate big brother…that is, you suddenly want to kiss him and hug him…”
— “Forget it, with your personality, how could you possibly be tempted.”
Gu Mian closed his eyes.
From the moment he first met Li Songyun as the starting point to the end when Li Songyun left without hesitation, in this long time dimension of twenty-six years, he had many times when he wanted to get close to Li Songyun.
But he had never been loyal to his wife.
He just restrained his emotions again and again and drew a clear line between himself and Li Songyun.
He didn’t want to let anyone’s death affect his emotions anymore, and he didn’t want to bear the pain of loss and profound loneliness.
His father only told him that soldiers need to be rational and calm, and that exposing preferences was equal to exposing weaknesses.
But he never told him that love was not only a weakness, but also an armor.
….
Gu Mian opened the dialog box with Li Songyun. Since he agreed to divorce Li Songyun, Li Songyun removed him from the blacklist. At this moment, their chat page was empty.
He had a lot to say to Li Songyun, but he didn’t know how to start. After thinking about it for a long time, he said that he had left his antipyretic medicine at home and asked Li Songyun if his fever had gone away.
After a while, Li Songyun replied: “Thank you for your concern. I’m fine now. What can I do for you?”
At the same time, the system popped up a reminder of Li Songyun’s latest news.
In the photo that Gu Mian saw in the feed, Li Songyun and Gu Peifeng were having fun in the amusement park. Gu Mian could guess who the person who took the photo was without looking at the tall shadow cast on the ground in a certain photo.
Li Songyun: [May we all rush towards love, ideals and tomorrow.]
The last photo showed Li Songyun laughing happily as he rushed towards a hopeful tomorrow.
But in the tomorrow that Li Songyun longed for, he did not exist.
Gu Mian suddenly understood something. Just like food would go bad, the feelings stored in the heart would also rot and stink irreversibly.
Just like it was impossible for him to eat the moldy plate of food left in the microwave, it was impossible for Li Songyun to come back to him.
In these long twenty-six years, he had countless opportunities to save his relationship with Li Songyun, but he missed them all one by one.
The boundary he had drawn between himself and Li Songyun had now become an unbridgeable gap.
He couldn’t cross this gap, so he could only watch Li Songyun go further and further away, and at most he could say, “I’m sorry, I wish you happiness for the rest of your life.”
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